Malachi's Promise "And he shall turn the heart of the fathers to the children, and the heart of the children to the fathers...." Malachi 4:6

Monday, December 27, 2010

The Aunt Who Disowned Us

My mother's youngest sister, Pauline Meinzen - or Aunt Polly, as we always called her - was born this day in 1927. The photobooth photo at left was probably taken when she was 10 or 12.

I don't know what her childhood was like but her sisters have told me that she was spoiled and often got her way. Looking back from my adult perspective at my interactions with her and observing her interactions with others, it seems that she quietly barrelled her way through life, setting goals and achieving them.

Aunt Polly was the aunt who disowned her family - all 3 sisters and all 8 of us neices and nephews - after her father's death. There was a disagreement about who would pay for the funeral. I wasn't involved in the funeral payment problem but I was also disowned. That one action on her part darkened all the previous happy, childhood memories of her when I actually thought she loved me.

What happens to people to cause money to become more important than people and love and family?

Aunt Polly passed away several years ago. I hope she's having a happy birthday.

14 comments:

  1. Nancy:

    I have an uncle who disowned the family, my fathers youngest brother. It's so sad to have the family torn apart that way. He is still alive so now is not the time for me to blog about it but someday I will. Thanks for sharing.

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  2. Perhaps she felt that eveyone was not paying "their fair share." I know that would make me angry if that happened, but I do not think it was enough to disown someone.

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  3. So sad...maybe someday things will change....

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  4. That is so very sad, especially when you had warm memories previous to that.

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  5. That is sad I agree, funny how money can cause problems in families. We have had those problems in my parents generation and though people were not disowned there was always an under lying un happiness. Could happen in my generation if things do not get talked out.

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  6. This is a sad story. There have been situations in my and my husband's families that could have ended up this way, but the parties involved decided not to make a case of it.

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  7. Very sad. I've noticed how when someone in the family dies, often you find they were the ones holding everyone together so the extended family drifts apart. Jo

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  8. It's so sad when you see your family acting this way - I have a few stories I've gathered where bitterness seemed to win out over everything else. Such a shame!

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  9. I almost didn't publish this post.... It seems like this kind of thing happens more often than one would think. It's so good when these tendencies in families can be averted because relatives actively choose not to make the problem bigger than the people.

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  10. Your post has made me determined to get in touch with my cousins - as a kid I got on well with them, and any problem their parents have/had is not my issue. Internet stalking about to begin...

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  11. Jo, I'm so glad. It's a great step forward when we let the problems stay with those who had the problems. I hope you find your cousins soon!

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  12. Nancy, Aunt Polly may have had some form of borderline personality disorder. We have a case like this in our own family. Her behavior sounds so familiar. Our family motto is "don't engage". Its hard, but its the only thing that doesn't make things worse. I'm sorry things didn't end well.

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  13. She sounds like a person that just wanted to have her own way with everything. I have seen people become enraged about the slightest disagreement, so maybe money wasn't even the issue.

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